I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
Randomize
