sometimes i wish i was able to text my cat and tell him i miss him and that i'm thinking about him
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
Randomize
