I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
in retrospect, sexting while high was a mistake - I meant to say "I'll fuck you stupid, baby" but of course I said "I'll fuck your stupid baby"
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
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