nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
Randomize