She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
i just walked downstairs to find my brother wearing a crossingguards vest and boxers. when i asked him where he got it he just looked at me, smiled, and kept feeding the dog yogurt
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
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