you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
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