The best thing happened. Some guy was butchering Conway Twitty at karoke and the power went off in the whole bar. And someone shouted "you pissed jesus off when you messed with conway!"
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
My mom asked me if I ever go on dates. I had to suppress the urge to ask if having casual sex with a freshmen counts as dating
I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Randomize
