Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
When we were finished she immediately got up, cut a star out of a piece of paper, colored it gold, taped it to my chest and deemed me the Sheriff of Sex.
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