Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
whose ass print is on the piano?
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
