she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
You made out with two different species that night
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
Randomize
