He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
Guess the answer to the last 2 texts right and you'll get a boob shot tonight. Guess wrong and it will be a picture of a used, boogery kleenex.
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
My high school reunion is Thursday so I need to find an outfit that says "Haha, you got fat and I got tits. Suck it, bitches."
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
Randomize
