Will you blow on my dice?
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
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