We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
Just set the kids up with doughnuts downstairs so I could go up and masturbate uninterrupted. I am such a good mom.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
Randomize