You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
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