when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
Randomize
