i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
Randomize
