Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
So I was putting on a condom and looked to my right to not make eye contact, she said did you just look at the American flag while putting that on. I said this one's for Team USA.
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
Randomize
