i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
I'm sitting alone in a bar pretending to watch football because I don't know where the liquor store is around here and I'll be god damned I'm going to be sober on my day off.
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
Are these your boobs on my camera?
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
Randomize
