I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
Sober December ended when I found beer behind my bed...I lost $2000 but spent 6 hours sober. Meet me at the bar?
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
His daughter is our waitress. I left her a ten dollar 'I'm sorry I'm a whore and fucked your dad' tip...
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
Randomize
