i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
He was all “please don’t bail because I’m missing work for this” last night
Honey no, I need dick. I’m not going to bail
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
Randomize
