I'm gonna get wrecked tn I might have to keep my phone at home cause I'm sure ill send you really weird txts
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
Randomize