It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
The best thing happened. Some guy was butchering Conway Twitty at karoke and the power went off in the whole bar. And someone shouted "you pissed jesus off when you messed with conway!"
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
Everclear isn't food dammit
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
According to the office gossip the new secretary is “a homewrecking whore”. Think I should spend $27 on a fake wedding ring?
Yes! Want that picture of you and my nephew?
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