Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
He passed out mid-signature
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
Malibu has added tequila to its rum. It's like when two beautiful gaybies come together an spawn a unicorn that only cries jellybean tears.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
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