she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
This girl just introduced herself as Queefer Sutherland. She's on a roller derby team. What. The. Fuck.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
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