i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
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