Don't you send me to vm
I woke up and she had breakfast in bed for me
RUN RUN RUN RUN
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
Randomize
