Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
things that need to be invented #43: vodka that also acts as birth control.
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
this must be what syphilis tastes like
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
Randomize
