you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
Randomize
