i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
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