my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
I left myself a note saying 'buy a hamster but not an orange one like this pen'
omg so drunk
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
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