you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
You should have been there to see the look on her face when I told her that my dog gives better head than her. It was a beautiful symphony of shock, anger, and disbelief.
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
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