super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
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