All she gave me for breakfast was raw toast. How can she expect me to eat raw toast?
You mean bread?
I just found out that my father was a Human condom for halloween when I was 4. And to think I used to wonder where my sense of humor came from.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
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