i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
So, you didn't have time to come pick me up but you did have time to get plastered and then write "champagne money" on every one of my statuses for the past month?
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
The cat just walked up and made eye contact with me while I had sex. I'm going to have to burn the house down with him in it.
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
I could fuck to npr.
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
Some mornings I close deals. Other mornings I puke out my window while I’m driving down the highway
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
Randomize