Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
Randomize
