I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
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