i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
Randomize
