Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
that thing about your dad's boner was meant to be a compliment
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
Randomize