some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
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