have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
I feel like I have African malaria. I just remembered singing Teenage Dream in full to that biker couple at the bar.
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
Randomize
