we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
You drunkenly promised dick pics on your way out the door and then never delivered. I don't know how I'll ever be able to trust you again.
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize
