I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
If penises could fly, my ass would totally be an airport.
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
i think i just naturally attract stoners
Randomize
