Your dad touched me again.
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
that is very illegal...i love you.
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
Randomize