If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
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