You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
Miracle whip is the devil's jizz.
You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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