Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
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