Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
It was awkward being the only one at the wedding who knows that the bride and groom met when she gave him a lap dance at a strip club
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
She's the barista slut.
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
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