Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
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