Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize