am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
you were so drunk you tried to use the microwave as a calculator for your BAC
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
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